Difficult Words
by creater1496
Summary: One-shot: It's the Anniversary of Anna and Elsa's parents' deaths, and the first one they've spent together; how will they handle it? I don't own Frozen, and this is just me trying to defeat writer's block! (T for scary stuff)


**Hey guys! Just a little one-shot before chapter four of Reaching Out; I'm still working a few things out there! Hope this satiates you for now! I, um… I don't own Frozen…. Disney does… :'(**

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The events of the Great Thaw had taken place several months ago, and still Anna and Elsa had a less than perfect relationship. Elsa was still afraid of losing control. She was getting better, of course, much better; she no longer jumped quite as often at Anna's sudden approach, nor did she avoid her as she did the first month. In fact, she encouraged the contact, convinced by her sister that practice makes perfect.

However, today was different. Today, Elsa was holed up in her room, dealing with paperwork, while Anna searched for anything at all to do, varying from taking walks with Kristoff, to planning elaborate courses for lunch and dinner, which were very quiet affairs.

Today was the Anniversary of their parents' deaths. Of course, Anna didn't tell Kristoff this, for worry that the young man would look at her differently, perhaps with pity or concern, so he was fairly confused at the stiff atmosphere. He cleared his throat a few times during dinner, and attempted to start some form of conversation, only to receive glass from both Anna and Elsa. He left after dinner, to visit his family, giving Anna a quick kiss and promising to be back for lunch tomorrow. Elsa stood, claiming she had yet further paperwork to go through, even some left over from the visitors of her Coronation, seemingly so very long ago.

Anna followed behind, trying to make conversation. She began to babble, chatting way at something seemingly very important to her, something that Elsa was in no way paying attention to.

"What do you think?" Anna asked, seeing Elsa'a far-away look, to see if she was paying attention.

Elsa started slightly, her face a mask of faux composure. "Mmhm," she agreed, making Anna smile in triumph.

"Well, goodnight," Elsa said at the same time Anna began, "Do you think I-" They laughed lightly, and Anna hurriedly asked first, pretending she didn't hear her dismissal,

"Do you think I could maybe spend the night?" she asked, causing Elsa's eyes to widen slightly in apprehension.

"Its just," Anna went on, seeing Elsa's reaction, "We haven't had a sleepover in so long, and I really miss it," she blundered, knowing they had actually just a month ago been practically sharing a room.

Elsa sighed audibly, and opened her door.

"Of course," she said gently, gesturing for Anna to step inside. Anna smiled and relaxed visibly, and practically skipped into the room.

She had hoped to get to talk to Elsa for at least a few hours before falling asleep, but at every attempt at conversation, Elsa only mumbled one-worded answers, her eyes already closed. Anna sighed, heavy with restrained disappointment, and curled up on her side, her back turned on her sister.

Elsa waited about twenty minutes, to be sure her sister was asleep, only assured when she heard a light snore. She opened her eyes and felt a smile spread across her face, seeing that her sister had turned over in her sleep to face her again. Elsa ran delicate fingers through her sister's loose hair, so close to the color of their father's hair. _At least she has this.. And she has Mama's freckles, _she thought forlornly, looking down at her own pale hair and skin, her hand now against her sister's face, brushing along the scattering of freckles there. After two hours of tortuous thought, she curled up around her knees and hoped for a dreamless sleep.

* * *

_The storm was a giant beast, it's menacing eyes reflecting off the water dangerously. Its laughter shook the belly of the ocean, forcing wave upon wave on top of a very small ship in the middle of the waters. The King was in the middle of the chaos, his arms formed protectively around a figure that wasn't quite visible. The figure was shaking and he was murmuring comforting words to it, and finally, clarity arose, and it was the Queen; she was very frightened, her skin had gone pale and her hair was a mess of loose locks. _

_"It's alright," the King said, his voice suddenly clear over the roar of the beast in the clouds, "We'll get out of this, and we will see our daughters again, and-" _

_Before he could say anything further, a particularly sharp laugh from the beast caused a wave to seemingly form straight above the ship, and crash down in the middle of the insignificant structure, harshly separating the King and Queen. The Queen toppled over the edge, never to be seen again, but the King was slammed up against the wall of the ship, and blood matted his hair to his scalp._

Anna was brought to wakefulness by a sudden drop in temperature, and, as she opened her eyes to search for extra blankets, heard agonized cries. Anna opened her eyes completely, and sat up a little, leaning back on her arms. What she saw completely shocked her; Elsa, her blankets thrown off, shivering and huddled in on herself, arms wrapped around her torso, holding herself together. Her face was set in pain and her hands were covered in frost which was beginning to spread out beneath her slight frame.  
"No…" she was saying, whimpering in her sleep.  
Finally understanding that Elsa was in the midst of a nightmare, Anna scooted closer to her sister and shook her shoulder lightly. "Elsa, wake up, come on, Elsa, it's only a nightmare…"

_Suddenly the weather was too much, and the boat tipped ever farther over. The King stumbled, tripping over his feet in a daze, and fell over the side; his foot caught on the railing of the ship, and he brought the entire structure down with him. The ship turned over, now entirely submerged. The sea was alone once again. Under the surface, however, the King was visible as if he were in the clear air, though it was clear he was drowning; his face was darkening, turing a terrifying shade of purple, and the more breaths he took, the more he coughed and sputtered and struggled for the surface, all to no avail.. The King stopped struggling and his body floated to the dark recesses of the unreachable ocean floor.  
"Elsa!" a voice said. She turned, and saw the Queen standing, hands held hopelessly in front of her, looking at the spot where her husband had been. "What have you done?! This has gotten out of hand!" she shouted dangerously, and Elsa was suddenly fifteen years old again, begging her mother to stay, and regretting harming her sister. _

_"No, I didn't-" she started, trying to explain, but the Queen grabbed her by her shoulders and shook her, hard. _

_"You've got to wake up, Elsa! Please!" she shouted in anguish, but her voice was wrong. It sounded like- _

"Anna..? But, where.." Elsa was mumbling, tossing on the bed. A light snow had started up, and Anna was shaking her sister, trying hard to get her to wake up.

"I didn't…" Elsa said again, jerking her body, trying to escape Anna's grasp, it seemed. "It wasn't me… wasn't my fault…" she trailed off, shivering harshly as she cried, her sobs breaking through Anna's stupor.

"ELSA!" she shouted, shoving her sister hard in the shoulder. Elsa gasped loudly, eyes opening, then blinking rapidly, confusion written on her face. She was clearly still groggy, halfway asleep.

"Mamma…? Where… Where did..." she said quietly, eyes roving the room frantically. "I didn't… I didn't mean to…" Finally, her eyes met Anna's worried ones, and she sat up a little. "Oh," she breathed, rubbing the heels of her hands into her eyes. The snow froze where it was, time seeming to stop. Anna put a hand to her sister's freezing face.

"Elsa… it's okay, Elsa…" she murmured gently, her eyes stinging from the mention of their mother; Elsa _had_ been thinking about it, after all.

Suddenly, Elsa removed her hands from her face, and surprise, then fear crossed her face in rapid succession. She wrenched herself from Anna's reach, backing up until she hit her head on the headboard; the snow which had remained suspended in the air fell suddenly, in a heap, and Anna shivered.

"Anna, you have to get out, I'm not in control, you have to-"

"Elsa, what do you mean you aren't in control? Do you see it snowing? Any ice? No." she said with confidence, taking her sister's hands, even as Elsa tried to rip them from her grasp.

"it's okay, Elsa." she said in a gentle voice. "I miss them, too."

Elsa let out a shuddering breath and lowered her head, closing her eyes against the pain that flared behind her ribs. She felt a hand much warmer than her own tuck under her chin, lifting her head.

Elsa slowly opened her eyes and was met with a stern gaze from Anna. "No." Anna said, in the most serious tone Elsa had ever heard, "You can't feel bad for missing your own parents- our parents: I won't allow it." And as suddenly as the anger was there, it was replaced with sorrow. Elsa sat up straighter, nervous.

"So, why-" Anna stopped herself, then seemed to think better of it, continuing, "Why weren't you there?"

Elsa jerked in surprise, and Anna backed up into her small spot beside Elsa. The older girl sighed, and leaned her head against the headboard, wincing when the sore spot hit from where she had backed up too fast, but she didn't make a move to reposition it.

"Well.." Anna jerked to attention; she hadn't expected Elsa to actually explain herself. "You know that my… abilities… are controlled by my emotions," she began. "When they- I mean, um, when I was told of what… what happened.. I- well, I just…" Anna's face creased with concern; she had never seen Elsa struggle with words before. She took her sister's hand and Elsa smiled at her gratefully, giving it a gentle squeeze. "I panicked; a blizzard started right there in my room, and all of my furniture froze. As the informers were leaving, I accidentally froze the door solid… After that, I really don't know- I mean, I guess I collapsed or something, because I woke up hours later, and my skin was raw with frozen burns…" she trailed off for a moment, flexing her fingers inward, studying the perfect skin that now graced them. "Anyway, so I was too afraid to leave, and told Kai and Gerda, through the door, that you should take over, instead…." Something dawned on Elsa then, and she looked swiftly at her sister. "How did you do it?" she whispered. Anna was looking down now, her eyebrows knitting together.

"I didn't.. I couldn't.." she admitted, her voice fragile. "Actually, Kai took over for me when he realized that I wasn't able to speak… I'm really grateful for it…" Elsa's heart gave a painful lurch, and she wrapped her cold arms around her sister.

"I'm so sorry, Anna… I didn't-"

"It's fine, Elsa," she insisted, returning the hug with feeling, her skin warming, even against the cold temperature.

The two didn't speak for a long time, and Elsa realized that Anna's breathing had deepened. She laid her sister down onto the soft mattress, smiling at her sister's ability to fall asleep so fast when she was really tired. She trailed a hand along the length of her sister's face, watching as her eyebrows rose, but her eyes didn't open.

"I love you, Anna," she breathed, curling up next to her beloved sister.

To Elsa's utter surprise, Anna murmured, in a voice heavy with lethargy, "I love you, too, Elsa…." and then only soft snores could be heard from her.

Elsa snuggled close to Anna, and smiled, knowing that nightmares were now far away, and that sleep was close by.

Threading her fingers with her sister's own, Elsa fell asleep quickly, and knew no more terrors.

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**Woah, you guys don't have any idea what I went through with this story! I had it down way longer and more intricate, but I accidentally closed out the window while working on separate homework, and… yeah…. Not the greatest day of my life! Hope you enjoyed anyway, thought about it all morning and realized it needed to be written! **


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